Hi Everyone,
I apologize if I sound like a corny and robotic after school special, but as the year winds down, make sure you reach out to your loved ones and just live in the moment.
Without sounding too sappy, your messages made me feel so happy. Just because I’m your instructor, doesn’t mean I’m not invincible to life. The reason why I enjoy teaching so much is because you all teach me as much, if not more, than I teach you.
This past month has been really difficult for me. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder (no surprises there) and one of the manifestions of this is extreme nerves and worry. I was worried (still am TBH) about letting you all down, and not being the best instructor that you all deserve. I felt so helpless and frustrated and just feeling like a total loser.
Without getting too personal, it has been a really difficult two years for me. Last year, I had a traumatic incident at the two year college that I used to teach at. It left me so scattered that I took a semester hiatus from teaching. This semester was supposed to be my big return, putting all those bad feelings and nerves aside.
You all did. Silly moments and memories just pop into my mind, and I am so grateful I met all of you (even the lazy ones) and you’re all so unique and just ooze originality. I could go off on a tangent but I want to say thank you to all of you. Thanks for your kind words about Niko, your outreach, and just always making me smile when coming to class, even on days that I’d barely be functioning due to insomnia, stress, anxiety, etc.
You’re probably thinking, “Why are you getting so personal and telling us this, teach?”
It’s because of things I’ve heard in the past week regarding you all. In one of my classes, a student’s brother passed away a few days ago. Another student had personal issues come up. Another student’s father is currently in the hospital. One student’s aunt passed away.
My own boyfriend (Niko was originally his and considers him his brother) was having a mental breakdown this past month. I had to serve as his therapist, while dealing with my own stuff. He had some fallout at the office, but all is stat quo now.
Long story short/ TL;DR We’re people, we go through effed up things, and good people make life easier.
Also, if you’re going through shit in your life – it will get better. If things are good, then that’s awesome and I couldn’t be happier for you.
BTW – I WILL STILL BE DOING POSTS AND YOU ARE ALL STILL RESPONSIBLE FOR THE WORK! Pretty much – just complete everything by the 28th deadline and you’re solid. I’ll be doing a follow up post shortly.
QOTD: What are three random facts about you?
1. I LOVE hockey. Specifically, the Tampa Bay Lightning
2. I can’t handle spicy food (revoke my Spanish card).
3. I actually despised public speaking growing up, and never wanted to go into teaching.
English 110 @ Queens College | Fall 2018 